You are the magic

Posted on Instagram on July 19, 2018

"I want to be magic. I want to touch the heart of the world and make it smile. I want to be a friend of elves and live in a tree. Or under a hill. I want to marry a moonbeam and hear the stars sing. I don't want to pretend at magic anymore. I want to be magic." (Charles de Lint)
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A magic moth of lace and inspiration for @darktownsally 🖤 who paints beautifully and who I happened to talk with yesterday, as she inquired about the moth I had posted.
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And we talked about artist things.
Like how sometimes you want to do something, but people expect you to be doing something else.
Like how you feel pressured sometimes about making what they want from you, instead of what you feel the strongest call toward.
It's common, I think. Even if we are doing the thing we love (be it jewelry or painting), for some of us it's a struggle - wishing to be completely free while worrying about the outcome. The feedback. The financial side of it too.
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And I shared with her how the biggest shift that therapy has brought me so far is that I came back to my art in such a different way. That I go there and do my thing for myself. I share it with the world, yes, and I am ecstatic if it touches others. I am grateful for the sales that allow me to keep doing it. But most of the times, when I am there working, the world and its expectations are left outside. And it's perfect. It's true. It's everything.
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I used to worry so much about how I could create something that was true to me and the work I want to make for this world, while also please others.
It never worked. And I stressed. I even stressed every time I used silver. Will it sell? If it doesn't I will waste so much precious material!
Of course at the root of it there was my fear and my sense of not being enough.
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Now? I do it and trust.
Trust that the love and truth and energy of the work, its soul, will find their way.
And, shockingly, it seems to work.
Yup, I am still surprised every time I make a sale.
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This is to say...we are the magic. We are the light we seek. We are the ones that try to block all of that awesomeness to shine, with our fear.
This moth says trust, trust, trust.
Shine shine shine.